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green goblyn is green



Race: Goblyns: serious business
Realm: Nan Belegorn
Real Name: Rusty Shackleford
Started: June 2001
Unit: Hell Hammer

Weapon of Choice: not having a weapon of choice.


eyrtk is loud... very loud and 5 foot nothing. He is often depicted as a green humanoid monster with glowing eyes and a gaping pie hole surrounded by fleshy-colored peasants. He eats rubber dinosaur figurines to gain the strength of the extinct animal to which they bear likeness even though the physical improvement has not been proven. He sings the French National Anthem in a rich baritone while walking among people, whoever fails to sit down is accused of being a communist and summarily devoured like so many Jalapeno Chedder potato chips.

Now everyone in the realm knows that eyrtk could ride anything. No warg could throw him, no sir! Fact is, I only heard of eyrtk getting' throwed once in his whole career as a goblyn. Yep, it was that time he was up Nan Belegorn way and decided to ride him a tornado.

Now eyrtk wasn't gonna ride jest any tornado, no ma'am. He waited for the biggest gol-durned tornado you ever saw. It was turning the sky black and green, and roaring so loud it woke up the evles away over in Gayville. Well, eyrtk jest grabbed that there tornado, pushed it to the ground and jumped on its back. The tornado whipped and whirled and sidewinded and generally cussed its bad luck all the way down to Dur Demarion. Tied the rivers into knots, flattened all the forests so bad they had to rename one place the Dead River. But eyrk jest rode along all calm-like, give it an occasional jab with his spear.

Finally, that tornado decided it wasn't getting this goblyn off its back no-how. So it headed back up to Nan Belegorn and jest rained itself out. Made so much water it washed out the all them trees. That tornado was down to practically nothing when eyrtk finally fell off. He hit the ground so hard it sank below sea level. Folks call the spot Blood Valley.

Anyway, that's how rodeo got started. Though most goblyns stick to wargs these days.



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