Great War

In dee beginning, Melshekhaad create everyt'ing. Other gods, as well as all Goblyns. Dis be known as Age of Creation, and dees goblynz, dey be True Goblynz. Strong an' quick, ruthless an' bloodthirsty. Filled with rage an feer no death. All goblyn souls be sent to River of Souls wen dey die, and den dey just come bakk out again when new youngling be born. So who care if die? Dis give greenskins dee bloodlust dat makes dem edge over races. Dey be way Goblynz meant to be, Melashekhaad true creation. An' with Pissran running around world, der always be moar greenskins den any uther race. We best dem all, and be dee bestest race on dee earth.

Other races doh, dey be jealous of Goblyn might, an fact dat we better den dem at everything. So Marjack, god of Bugbears, decide to rally up other races, and go to war with Goblyns. Dis be known as dee Great War, and it be long an' bloody. Out of all dee greenskins in dee world, only five be powerful enough to kill other gods. Deez be dee most famous of all Goblynz, and names still be known today. Deez be Reth, Baulk, Neb, Sifu, and Skribbit. An' dey best lesser gods in combat, an strike dem down. Dee war continue, and it look like enemies be starting to lose ground. Marjack t'ink dis be unacceptable. So he make plan. Baulk, dee weakest of dee Great Goblynz, be very fat, gluttonous Goblynz. It be hunger dat make him so vicious in battle. Marjack find him alone one night, and ask if want to taste bestest, most delicious t'ing in all world for all eternity. And of course, he talking 'bout goblyn souls. Because it true, dey be best tastin' ting could ever imagine. Baulk, knowing dis, agree anyway. Marjack transport him to dee mouth of dee River of Souls, an as soon as he see dee souls go by, he nom on dem. Take bites of as many as he can. Some he get little bite, some big. Some he take so much, dee youngling not survive birth.

As war rage on dee surface, Goblynz nohtis change. Younglings born be weaker, timid, less rage and bloodlust in dem. An dey not be as good to fight. Dee war begin to shift. Soon after dis, Neb, one of dee Great Goblynz, be ambushed and killed. Dey say he take down hundreds of pinkies, but still...he fall. Now der only be three Great Goblynz left, and Reth call to speak to Sifu and Skribbit. Sifu demand dey go find Baulk and kill him. Stop dee curse upon all new younglings, turn dee tide of dee war. Reth say no, der still be too many gods left, and if dey leave, war will be lost. But Sifu very stubborn female, she not take no for answer. Skribbit quiet; not goblyn of many words. Reth noh dat he follow Sifu wherever she go, dat loyal to her. He sigh, an say again dat we not noh where Underworld be. We hav idea, but not noh. If leave, and not succeed, will lose war.

Sifu not care, an' leave to find Baulk. Skribbit follow, and together dey travel across many lands, waters and wastes and mountains, until finally dey reach dee edge of dee world. An' der, just out of sight, be dee gates to dee frozen Underworld. Sifu an Skribbit approach, but den figure appear in front of dem. It be guardian, keeper of gate to Underground. He be huge creature, wit six arms, and have a weapon in each. Sifu march up an' demand to pass, to find Baulk. Gate guardian say he not noh wat she talking about, an' cannot pass. Sifu threaten him again, an' he ready great weapons. She pounce at him, an dey fight. Dee guardian swing his great arms, but he too slow for dee warriors. Dey move all around him, slicing at skin and hitting with spells. Wit her an' Skribbit together, dey defeat dee great guardian. As he bleedin' to death, say you are great warrior, wat want from me before I die? Sifu demand his powers. Guardian do as say, an' Sifu grow bigger, an dee extra arms sprout, an' she roar wit' power. But wen turn to Underworld gate in search of Baulk, she cannot enter. Guardian laugh as he die, an' say dat Sifu take his power, so must take his place. Skribbit rage, an' turn bakk to threaten creature, make him change wat be done, but he already dead.

Skribbt be overcome wit fury like he never known before. All know he be loyal to Sifu, but dis go deeper den any would guess, an' many t'ink now dat she be his mate. Dat aside, Skribbit be expelled from dee underworld an' shot across dee sky like blazing green comet. Dee gods an' dee goblynz looked up from der war, an goblynz somehow knew dat dis be sign of woe, an' der hope be shattered. Skribbit land in dee sea, dee sea boil around him. He fall to dee crust of dee world, an dee rage inside him melt it away, raising mountains of fire in dee depths. Dee earth itself shook wit dis rage, an it consume him, an awake beyond dee world, as dee God of Rage we venerate today.

So wit Sifu and Skribbit gone, dee armies of monster and Grik overtake dee Goblynz. It end in one final battle. Dee armies be crushed, an' tossed aside, and Reth be captured. Other gods take him to der city to be judged. Dey force him to kneel in great hall, wit dee gods sitting on der thrones in front, an' dey sentence him to death. Reth always bin dee greatest of dee Goblynz, an' favored by Melashekhaad for his strength an' cunning. So jus' before dee blade reach his skin, he call out to dee biggest of gods, creator of all, an' ask to bring wrath upon dem. Melashekhaad usually very lazy god. After all dat creatin' business, he pretty much done dealin' with mortals. But he hear Reth call out, an' so Melashekhaad reach down to dee earth wit one hand, an' pluck Reth up an out of dee world. Dee sheer weight of god crush everyt'ing around it an crack dee earth. Dee great city be destroyed, an all dee gods bodies be ripped apart by dee force. In it place form dee burning mountain of Nezzar, an all dee mountains surrounding. Reth be placed on Melashekhaad shoulder, an' dat be wher he sit to dis day.

So wit all dee Great Goblynz gone, an' dee betrayal of Baulk, Goblynz be scattered an' lost, wit no leaders to rally dem. Dey run to dee woods and dee mountains, hunted down by other races. Dis be known as dee Age of Retreat, an' it be one of dee longest an' most wretched ages in all Goblyn history.